My latest fortune cookie post found several of you sharing some tips on how I should go about snagging myself a man.
In a word:: Cleavage.
Showing it, flaunting it, putting it on display for that oh so hot man to see. Apparently, this is the way to a man's heart (among other things - like a proposal. Yeesh! Where was your mind at?).
Unfortunately, this is the one area I am lacking in. I mean, baby got back and all, but no front, if you know what I mean. (I'm the chairwoman of the I.B.T.C.) Anyway, I'm sure that I'd be laughed at by one and all if I even attempted to be sexy and flaunt what I most certainly do not have.
I actually did have some boobs 35 pounds ago, but as the fat goes, so do the boobs. At this rate, I will never trap find myself a husband if what I'm being told is true.
So, until I save up enough money to buy myself some Cleveland cleavage, what else should I be doing to catch the eye of that special someone?
11 comments:
You definately have more than a former coworker of mine. Her sister used to tell her that she needed to go have FRONT tattooed across her chest so people didn't get confused. And she did have a boyfriend, too bad he was already married to another woman...
Oh my gosh! This is literally the same advice I've been giving my single girlfriend, for years!
Everytime she's going to meet a guy, I tell her to show more cleavage, or even a little bit of nipple. Works every time.
Miss Martha...what a cute blog Dawnelle :)
The water bra. My sister in law has one and loves it.
I suggest you just go for it. I'm sure with the economy falling so are the prices of medical miracles! Plus...you live SO close to Vegas and the prices there are Great! You will L♥ve the results.....just a heads-up though...it hurts worse than child-birth..but oh so worth it! Pain is temporary...looking hot in every top you try on is forever! L♥L!
Cleveland IS NOT all it's cracked up to be!!!!!! Just your cuteness, and personality should be enough to spark his interest!!! I'm just sayin, THE MOM
Well, I did make my hubby fall in love with me by giving him free burgers. But we were 17 at the time and I was working at the DQ in Fashion Place Mall. But come to think of it, I also showed some cleavage in my sexy brown polyester uniform. So, not sure which one it actually was.
Gee Martha, I always remembered you as curvy, sexy, and never holding back. Maybe Easy Curves could be your best friend (or the Bumpit aka BumpTit). I really don't think you have all that to worry about. Send me a private picture to my email showing your cleavland and I'll let you know how you measure up! hehe That's what friends are for!
I hear those chicken cutlets work nicely, but then its kind of like you are living a lie. Once your married the truth would come out...litterally. You need to find you a "butt" Man. Good luck my freind!
Listen here, I've got many a thing by whipping out the "one good boob". You should fair just fine until you buy your twins.
I am soooo with you on this one. They didn't call me "Titty from the Itty Bitty Titty Committee" for nothing.
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